Dry.

I have not been a good daughter lately.

I can't focus my thoughts on my prayer.

I can't confess that I did disappoint some people in my life who love me so much.

I don't want to start to pray because it only reminds me of being sinful, that I don't deserve any of those forgiveness.

I want to come back but I just feel I just can't knock the door, and it will be opened so easily for me, that would be unfair for the others.

I regret that recently I took His blessings only for granted.

I'm afraid that I don't deserve to receive such forgiveness and love.

I'm too selfish. I'm too fragile.

I want to meditate. At the moment, I don't feel like meeting anyone. I just want to lock myself in my room.

I want to go home but every time I try to find the key, I pull back.

I just don't want to be reminded of how useless I am.

I'm no good at all.

I really want to cry out loud, but I can't. I can't. My tears just won't come out.

I feel numb. I feel such an idiot.

It's like walking in a vast desert and I can't find any oasis nearby.