I always like the feeling when it's raining

tapi bukan gara-gara jadi batal pergi....>,<>

I know some people hate rains.

Cucian yang tidak pernah kering.

Jalanan yang becek, tanah lembek dan berlumpur.

Jalanan lebih macet dari biasanya.

Dan lain-lain.

I know some people love rains.

Suara rintik-rintiknya.

Bau tanah yang basah.

Suasana melankolis dan enak buat refleksi.

Dan lain-lain.

Mungkin emang dasar saya orang melankolis. Menulis blog pun hari ini jadi produktif gara-gara seharian hujan. Tidur-tiduran sepanjang hari juga ga masalah. Kalau seandainya tiap hari hujan, mungkin saya tidak akan merengek-rengek mau pergi dan sibuk setiap hari mencari-cari film yang baru di bioskop.

Tapi hujan tiap hari ya juga ga bagus.

Nelayan susah menangkap ikan.

Penerbangan jadi repot.

Keseringan hujan entar malah banjir.

Jadi inget ada kutipan di film serial Daai TV "Namaku A Tao", yang intinya : kalau kita menang judi/taruhan, artinya banyak orang yang sudah dirugikan. Walau kita senang, belum tentu orang lain juga bahagia.

But...also remember, "We can't always make everyone happy".

Random

Baru-baru ini saya baru tahu, kalau ternyata banyak orang yang suka berimajinasi, berfantasi, menciptakan dunia sendiri, cerita sendiri di dalam pikirannya. Ternyata, saya tidak aneh. Hehe, Mungkin memang karena otak kita strukturnya sama, jadi hal-hal seperti itu terjadi pada manusia normal umumnya.

Tapi, bingung juga ya kalo dipikir-pikir. Kalau manusia sama-sama memiliki kecenderungan untuk seperti itu, masih saja setiap manusia itu unik. Walau kecenderungannya sama, tetapi detilnya beda. Mungkin sama-sama berimajinasi, tetapi imajinasinya berbeda.

Pernah tidak terpikir seperti ini. Walau penyakit manusia aneh-aneh bentuk dan macamnya, tetapi orang-orang itu ga pernah sendirian, pasti ada yang bernasib sama. Padahal orang bilang, setiap manusia itu unik, tetapi mungkin ada kembaran kita di belahan dunia sana.

Tau kan 16 Jenis Personality nya Myers-Briggs? Sebanyak-banyaknya orang di dunia, pasti masuk salah 1 di antara 16 macamnya. Golongan darah, kalo ga A, B, AB, ya O.

Seaneh-anehnya dan seunik-uniknya pikiran kita, pasti pernah kan merasa,

"Ihhh....Kok sama sih?"

"Iya gw juga mikir gitu."

"Kok pikiran kita sama sih?"

Mungkin bakal ribet ya kalo Jumlah Tipe Manusia = Jumlah Manusia di Dunia Ini. Bisa-bisa rusuh. Makanya, diciptain persamaan di dalam perbedaan, biar nyambung. Perbedaan di dalam persamaan, biar saling mengisi.

Anyway,

Ada ga sih yang pernah mikir seperti ini? Atau memang cuma saya saja yang aneh. Hahaha...

I don't want to be that kind of person

There are things which if we put just a little bit more effort becomes possible, but there are things that are just beyond our control even if we already put our best possible effort.

We say,"I don't want to be that kind of person", but sometimes we do things we don't want to be at the first place.

Is it because of some limitations?

Or is it a karma? because we are too arrogant being ourself, saying it out loud that we don't want to be like that, but in the end, we become that kind of person.

Can someone change himself because of "I don't want to be that kind of person"?

If a human says, "I don't want to be greedy". Can s/he really do that?

"I don't want to be a promise breaker."

"I don't want to be selfish."

Wew, don't I ask too much to myself?

Gomapseumnida

My melancholic side is dominating at the moment. It's definitely because of a Korean series I just watched, Thank You (Gomapseumnida).

I only put one song in my playlist and set the Repeat : On.

Here is the translation of the soundtrack..

You’re a fool

I truly thank you

You’re true to me and

Gave me everything

You’re an angel

You must be tired and find it hard

To everlastingly believe in someone

Who is a nobody

Strange, it’s like you’re devoid of tears

You smile for me in illness

When I’m next to you

I cry tears of happiness

Words are stuck in my throat

I truly love you

My love for you, which I cannot express

I can finally tell you

I go on because of you

Strange, it’s like you’re devoid of tears

You smile for me in illness

When I’m next to you

I’m feeling very happy

Your smile

Shines on me

A long time from now, when the world ends

Remember, Do not forget

I’m always with you

I cry tears of happiness

Words are stuck in my throat

I truly love you

My love for you, which I cannot express

I can finally tell you

I go on because of you

I remember one scene when the female main character, Young Shin, was offering help to an old woman.

"Grandma, do you need help?"

Grandma nodded.

"Gomapseumnida," said Young Shin.

Why do you think she gave thanks to the old grandma????? Wouldn't it make much more sense if the old woman who thanked her instead???

She thanked her for letting her giving a hand, for accepting, instead of rejecting.

Another scene when Young Shin and Bom's Father, who left them when Young Shin was pregnant.

"Thank you for giving me Bom. She's like an angel. How could I be mad at you when you gave me such an angel..."

Imagine if you were Bom's Mother, have you ever thought that way??? Feeling thankful instead of revengeful to Bom's Father???

The world would be much more beautiful if we can see towards things that way.

Give thanks instead of compalining all the time.

But doing so is never as easy as saying it.

Freaky Friday

today is a lil bit freaky. ask me why?

hr ini ke mall. biasala, nonton mengisi waktu liburan yang tersisa dengan adik tercinta.

makan siang seperti biasa, di Pizza Hut! cuma yang ga biasa itu adalah...paket pesananya.. kalo org normal yang makan berdua, ya pesennya yang paket buat dua org dong. nah kita malah pesen paket yang buat empat org. setelah diitung2, ternyata jatohnya lebih untung. cuma ga pake mikir tuh, kalo perutnya ga segede gentung. matilaa. gila. ga usah dijelasin dengan detail deh. kesimpulannya sih, kita ga bakalan pesen makanan yang berlebihan dr gedenya perut lagi. EVER! gw sih skrg ga heran kalo ada org yg bisa mati gara2 kekenyangan. skrg aja ngebayangin pizza, rasanya ... iugh... no, thanks.. ga mau lagi deh, makan sampe kenyang. cukup porsi orang normal aj. gila. alhasil, malem2 sakit perut!!!! =.=

hal gila kedua adalah.. INCEPTION! gila. gila. gila. ini film keren abis. kreatif! mereka bener2 menggunakan anugerah Tuhan yang bernama Imajinasi dengan semaksimal mungkin. gw bener2 speechless. gila. gila. salut bgt sama org di balik film ini. ga bs ngomong apa2 lg deh. pokoknya ini film keren bgt. kalo jari gw ini jempol semua, duapuluh-duapuluhnya bakal gw angkat tinggi-tinggi. tanpa ada maksud lebay, tapi br kali ini gw memuji sebuah film setulus ini.

sisa harinya, sih ya.. biasa2 aja sih..

cuma ad bbrp gangguan.. ya bisa dibilang 'mengecewakan'

tapi ya anggep aja memang ada alasan lain yang ga bisa diketahui org2.. tambah bingung kan?

sepi

sepi sekali.

mungkinkah ada seseorang yang bersedia mendengar apapun curahan saya, apapun pemikiran aneh dan tak logis saya, apapun pergumulan dalam batin saya, dan apapun yang ingin saya keluarkan?

menulis mungkin adalah jawaban yang tepat. namun, ia tidak memberikan sebuah direct feedback (atau feedback langsung atau apapun deh istilahnya yang saya sudah lupa. padahal dulu pernah disinggung-singgung di HP804). tidak ada tanggapan atau pertanyaan-pertanyaan yang mengusik hati dan pikiran, yang mungkin bisa mengembalikan kita ke jalan yang benar atau menjatuhkan kita ke dalam jurang.

hidup akhir-akhir ini semakin penuh tanda tanya. padahal tidak ada yang sebegitu menghebohkan yang terjadi akhir-akhir ini. semuanya datar. tanpa celah. tanpa bebatuan.

keinginan pun bertambah menjadi-jadi sejadi-jadinya. akan tetapi, benarkah semua keinginan itu benar-benar diperlukan?

I may know what I want, but You know better what I need.

Education?

*after browsing some old files*

One year ago...

"Should I join this club? I heard a lot of activities are involved. I'm afraid my GPA would be affected..."

"I don't need part-time work. My bank account is enough for my monthly expenses. I should focus on study.."

"I need to study hard. I'm fighting for straight A+s!"

Those sentences are really, academic-oriented. Well, I might be one of those people. I admit that I am one of the acedemic oriented person. I fight for GPA, but the difference is I don't only fight for it. I'm looking for the knowledge deep inside, which is maybe sometimes forgotten. All we do maybe just memorize all the formula without knowing what the hell that one formula can do. We speculate the questions which have high probability to appear in the exam paper. And, after exam, we forget them all. We wait for our GPA to be released. The result is then released, no matter the result is, but one thing for sure, we don't even know what we have learnt through all semester. We go on to the next level, leaving those behind. As time goes by, things come, things go, but GPA remains. Is this what we call education?

WOAHHH.

Can you believe it? I WROTE THAT ONE YEAR AGO!

One year later..

All I do maybe just memorize all the formula without knowing what the hell that one formula can do. I speculate the questions which have high probability to appear in the exam paper. And, after exam, I forget them all. I wait for my GPA to be released. The result is then released, no matter the result is, but one thing for sure, I don't even know what I have learnt through all semester. I go on to the next level, leaving those behind. As time goes by, things come, things go, but GPA remains. Is this what I call education?

The -trying-to-be-wise-words-but-apparently-not has succeeded to slap its own creator in her very own face.

I know how to be a good Pharisee.

I know exactly how to be a good hypocrite.

But..

It was written one year ago! People changed! Now, I know how to defend myself with some good cliché excuses.

I will try better NEXT SEMESTER! *another 'good' quote*