did i let it go, for real?

i was looking for a small hole to crawl in

but i couldn't

not because i wasn't little enough

it was just no holes that would let me in

now

when i (think) i'm ready to give it up and let it go

the door seems to be opened

i can walk in step by step

but i'm not sure whether i'd take the decisions to come in

or just stay outside

it's funny to think that

i was finding it so hard back there

when i (think) i already could let it go

it just happens the way i expected it to be

ironic?

what does it mean?

does this really mean anything?