Friday, January 7, 2011

Nilai

Seandainya di dalam sekolah tidak ada Nilai yang dikenal sebagai "tolak ukur" pemahaman seorang murid terhadap pelajaran yang diajarkan, apa yang akan terjadi?

Mungkin sebagian akan berpikir,
"wah..itu mah mana ada yang mau belajar"

BENARkah?

Sekarang kalau pertanyaannya dibalik, "untuk apa kalian belajar?"

Kesampingkan dulu itu jawaban mulia (dan munafik :P) seperti "untuk mendapat ilmu dll",
pasti sebagian bakal terpikir untuk menjawab "buat dapetin NILAI (bagus)"

ya kan? ya kan?

Nah, seandainya TIDAK ADA yang namanya nilai, jawaban "buat dapetin nilai bagus" itu pasti ga ada.

Lalu, apakah jawabannya langsung berpindah jadi jawaban mulia seperti untuk menimba ilmu dkk? Tidak juga sih. Yang parah malah nanya balik, "jadi buat apa belajar??"

Tapi at least ga ada kan jawaban buat SEKEDAR dapetin nilai bagus. So, it's all or nothing. Antara yg BENER-BENER NIAT belajar dan yang GA NIAT belajar.

Kalau otaknya masih waras sih, gw rasa dia ga bakal milih buat GA NIAT belajar selama-lamanya. Toh, dia lulus ga dapet apa-apa kan? Udah ga ada nilai dan ga dapet ilmunya pula. By right, mestinya ada dong perasaan bersalah buang-buang duit sekolah mahal-mahal, masa gw ga dapet satu ilmu pun, jadi gw harus belajar! Nah kalau ada nilai yang tertulis di ijazah, yah tenang-tenang aja walaupun ilmu yang dipelajarin langsung lupa habis ujian, toh gw MASIH PUNYA nilai kok.

Kalau mau dipikir lebih lanjut lagi, yah daripada ga niat belajar sama pelajarannya, yah mendingan pilih pelajaran/jurusan yang disuka dong? Ngapain buang-buang duit maksa-maksa masuk bisnis kalau ternyata minatnya di bidang design? Mungkin masalah bentrok antar ortu dan anak yang mau pilih jurusan kuliah bisa berkurang, walau ga dijamin juga sih, banyak faktor lain.

Tetapi kalau ga ada nilai, kasihan juga guru-gurunya. Gimana dia bisa mengukur kalau murid-muridnya udah bisa nangkep pelajaran yang udah dia ajarkan? Mungkin ada alternatif lain, tapi semua itu butuh energi dan waktu yang ekstra lebih. Kalau 1 guru cuma mengajar 3-4 anak sih bisa mungkin, tapi memang ada segitu banyak supply-nya?

Lanjut ke dunia kerja, susah juga dong buat perusahaan-perusahaan yang mau meng-hire karyawan baru terutama fresh-graduates. Gimana mereka bisa melakukan seleksi sebelum interview?

Apalagi buat negara seperti S******r yang kompetisinya tinggi, yang pake bell-curve, yang ga boleh tuh katanya semua orang dapet nilai A. Ada salah satu guru yang pernah bilang bahkan kira-kira begini, "kita bisa aja kasih kalian soal-soal yang gampang, tapi kita juga perlu buat membedakan 'the good student' dan 'the VERY good student' jadi kita perlu kasih soal yang susah dikit." Okay, jadi just being good is not good enough if wanna get straight As. Ga bisa salahin gurunya juga, kalau nilainya bagus semua yah, bukan bell-curve lagi itu namanya.

Nilai itu memang bisa dijadiin tolak ukur, tetapi itu bukan tolak ukur mutlak. (inget ada faktor hoki juga :P) Tetapi yaudah terima ajalah sistem nilai ini, kalau ga ada nilai yah susah juga dunia ini. Dunia pendidikan tanpa nilai itu bagaikan bersekolah di negeri dongeng. Yang perlu diinget ya jangan mencari nilai doang pas sekolah. Walaupun itu gw akui memang susah sih, apalagi kalau pelajarannya.....ya gitu deh :P

Thursday, January 6, 2011

How's Life?

New Year. New Layout :) even though I just picked it from what they provide on blogger.

okay, so. how's life?

life's been great. for my christmas present comes VERY EARLY this year (2011 not 2010, so it's not a late christmas present)

life's been great. for i'm excited to face what's in front of me. internships and ecas.

life's been great. for i'm still alive in one piece after what i've been through in last year. i can declare that 2010 is the most eventful year in my life so far.

life's been great. for me being home. with the beloved people.

but

i'm still a human in melancholy. sensitive. fragile. easily hurt and i hate that part of me being melancholy. for some uncertain reasons (even though i know why, but i resist to admit).

soon i'm going to start my internship. i once said i'd miss school. yes i will still do, i guess. i miss it for the fun, for being together with friends, doing silly things, have lunch together at canteen, gossiping in lectures, etc. actually last semester i felt of becoming a more 'social' person. i just like to interact with people more than i used to be.

some people might think that i'm a hypocrite for confessing to miss schools, tutorials, lectures, and even exams! how can't you not enjoy the opportunity of living one semester in NTU without any worries of exams?? they might think so. some people might think i don't want to look for change. well, honestly i'm ready for a change. but, don't you ever feel sad to leave something that has accompanied you during the past 2.5 years even though just for a little while? and working is something that you always can do after you graduate, unlike tutorials and exams, you're only given limited chances to meet them.

things that i think i'd hate about doing my internship is that the routines. i dunno if i can stand the routines. wake up early in the morning-work-going home-sleep. there all goes the cycle every weekday.

good thing is that i won't have to be worried about catching up with tutorials and lecture notes to maintain my grades. yes i do still have to maintain my working performance and interactions with my colleagues, but it's not something academical, it's something more personal and social, more being people-oriented.

so, in my current conclusion, this new semester's gonna be different from previous ones. time for me to learn how to be more people-oriented. got ecas to be done also. at least i'm not required to be academically kiasu to survive. at least i dun need to memorize some formulas from the lecture notes. at least i dun need to face the deadly exam period. i think i just need to be my self, and try my best to be a better person.

my feeling says some other things are also happening but i dunno what. but i know it's gonna be something exciting to be reflected by the end of the semester :)

#lovemylife

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Huff. I'm afraid of Failing

I'm serious. I haven't been doing well in my quiz. There is 90% of one of them that I'll fail. One of them I only managed to get 58 out of 100. I'm not exaggerating this case. I'm serious. And I hate sharing it to people because they just say "you can do it." The truth is I can't do as well as you think. I'm not that genius brainy girl, you know?

Just today I have a quiz and I'm only certain I can only get 48 out of 100. I'm really scared of failing.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Today's Reflection

God has a perfect plan. We can be like the Sadducees and close our minds to his revelation, or we can try to be like little children, eager to learn from our heavenly Father. He won’t lead us astray. If he moves our lives or the church in a direction we don’t fully understand, we can try to listen to him humbly, do our best to follow his lead, and trust that he will never let his people down.

God wants us to be ready to step out of our comfort zones when the situation calls for it. For the Sadducees, this meant accepting the possibility that God will raise the dead. For us, it may mean accepting a new priest in our parish, welcoming an unexpected pregnancy, or striking out in a new direction in our career. The possibilities are endless. The only thing constant is that God will be with us, no matter what, to guide us and teach us.

“Father, I surrender to your wisdom and your plan. Help me stay open-minded and soft-hearted.”

wau.org

Missing Home.

Oh, I hate it for being so melancholy and sensitive.
I have quizzes, club stuffs, e-learnings to do but... I just can't resist the feeling to miss home.
In last post I say that this is my second home, but now I'm not sure if there is any second or third.
My home is one and only. The place I'll return to someday.

-Home is where the heart is.

Friday, October 29, 2010

(temporary) Insomnia

-Okay, so I can't sleep now. Maybe I'm too excited for tomorrow?

-Okay, since I won't be able to get enough sleep of 5 hours. I might want to donate badly but I know my humane limit, so I think I just postpone my blood donation until...next time. If I want to wait for the school, I might need one year since I'll be having IA next sem. So, I think I'll try going to blood bank myself then?

-Recently I've been having a very normal hours of sleep. I've been sleeping around 11-12pm and wake up around 630am...(and sleep again after waking up for 1 hour haha) It's very different when you wake up in the morning and breath the morning air. It's like you've been reborn. I like it. I want to maintain it as possible as I can because I feel healthier both physically and mentally.

-I guess tonight is the time for me to enjoy the silence of night. I dunno why but night seemsalways be the perfect timing to blog. I never feel the urge to write in the morning. I never want to even turn on my computer. It's more like of a reflective time, and a prayer.

-October almost ends. I can say this is the most eventful month of the year, so far. I learnt a lot. A lot of wonderful blessings, tears of joy and sadness, obstacles, disasters, yet full of beauty of lives.

-I think now I can declare NTU as my second home. Haha..so it needs two years to say this. I try to learn to love everything I have here. Okay, it might not be easy. I know I still complain in some things and how I wish some things are different, but if I wish any better it would be a little bit too good to be true. So, just enjoy my time as long as I can.

-Just now I realized that I miss my FE 1001 lesson so much. I'm not sure why. The lecturer is 'charming' in his own way, yes. but that's not really the point. I just miss the mechanics. Maybe I'm just sick with statics because I'm not having a good time with them. Somehow I think mechanics is more challenging, maybe that's why I find it more interesting. I'm not saying I don't like my course or not feeling suitable in it, but I just feel something is missing, which is passion. I thought when I start my life as a university student I don't need to have any problems of finding what I want to do in life. but in fact, it is the starting point of everything. You start questioning things and thinking hard what to do in life. You know you can do more than just pursuing a career. Now, I'm not really sure if Civil Engineer is the one I want to pursue. I'm not sure my passion is there. Or maybe I just haven't realized it. Maybe I haven't found the one which can trigger it. Or maybe I'm meant to do anything else, which is still blurry at the moment. I just don't feel like good to pursue any academic-related thing. I'm not even sure if I want to continue my study to master degree. (a big no for PhD, research is not my thing. sorry) even if I want to, I would try as best as I can to avoid engineering field (what am I thinking?????) okay, I might change my mind in the future, but that's what I feel at the moment. I just need to find where my passion is.

-I ever thought of teaching, but since I haven't been really into the real field or experience the real thing of teaching I can't say further more. I might consider this option but..who knows? I just feel like it's good to be surrounded by children, compare to the real working field where competitions are everywhere, trying to get promotions as soon as possible, etc etc, I don't really think it's my thing. And if surrounded by children, you won't hesitate to act like one, right? :D you can feel young again and recalling the innocent memories :) It sounds like an ideal career for me (at the moment).

-IA or IO? I'm not sure. I can't be that decisive. I'm thinking to switch to IO due to some....things. It's still in consideration, anyway. Let's wait for the news from my 1st choice interviewing company and see how things going. I wonder what's taking them so long?? I'm not really optimistic they'd call me for interview, but at least give me some news!

-I want to sleep but I'm not sleepy.

Coming Home. again.

I know this is crazy. I just came back here last Sunday and tonight I'm flying. Why? Just like my pm said in msn some days ago. Some people do sacrifice in the name of love. Well, I can't say it's a full sacrifice, because I also wanna get away from these things for a while. Last time was not long enough haha.

And another crazy idea is. I have to donate blood before I'm flying. I hope everything goes well and smoothly. I just don't wanna miss this chance. again. Last time I couldn't donate because I was sick. And this time, I'm here with healthy body and soul with enough rest, I must not miss this chance again!!!

Take a Break.

I just want to take a break. I need some sleep RIGHT NOW.
Oh why people sometimes take others only for granted?? *me also i admit it*
Sometimes I wanna help but I just can't stand being taken for granted. Sorry!

How to take a complete break? A deep breath?
I know the answer! Run away, Get yourself disappeared and undiscovered for some time. It works!

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Quite Random..

-You know why I never change the layout for this blog for 2 years already? because I can use ANY COLOURS that I want, and they still fit in and look nice! But now, seems it's not working anymore. I dunno why, they just turn out to be yellow!

-Please don't playing games with my heart.

-What do I wanna do?

A Blessed Recess Week...

Yes, there will be a Reinforcement Concrete Design quiz on tuesday...
Yes, there will be a Structure quiz on thursday...
Yes, I only have done 3 out of 7 tutorials of RC Design...
Yes, I haven't started studying Structure, even reviewing...
Yes, I'm still a 10000000000000 steps behind of catching up my studies...

But...

Yes, I'm home...
Yes, I'm with my family, secure and safe with loads of love...
Yes, I'm here with them to go through with these difficulties...
Yes, I'm grateful I'm given a chance to experience the miracles and love...
Yes, I never thought that this recess week would be a wonderful one, full of life changing events for some others, full of life lessons, full of love and care... This is a blessing I should be thankful for..

These past few weeks, I have been taught not to rely on my own strength, to be flexible and decisive with every sudden decisions, not to be too stressful, to go through every obstacles, to believe that you can do it, and to just surrender everything to Him...

I am thankful for the opportunity to come home,
to witness the true love and care of a family,
where everybody supports each other,
no matter what happened in the past,
no matter what conflicts might have occurred,
one thing for sure is that we are one,
one family, where one never let anyone being left behind,
where laughters and tears of sadness and joy are shared,
where no lies, just a pure smile like innocent child's,
a hand willing to help, to give comfort and support,
with no expectations in returns,
only with hopes that everything gets better.